Solely In Black and White: My Apologies to Miss Sore Loser

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

My Apologies to Miss Sore Loser

I am big fan of the fun date, or as others have called it the arcade date.  The precise details as to why I enjoy this date still elude me, since it isn’t always fun nor is it an always a great dating venue. But the one universal truth that I have discovered is that girls love air hockey. No jokes! The smile on a girls face after scoring a goal is quite a sight, so long as she hits the puck into the right goal. ;)  Regardless, I think I enjoy the fun date because it allows me to challenge my dates in playful way. I must admit, I have had some very competitive adversaries; I even had one who “schooled” me as they say on playground.  I’m still not sure if part of chivalry is allowing the girl to win; if so, then I might be losing some points for graciousness. Okay, to be fair, I usually won’t make a spectacle out of my dates. For example, in a game of air hockey I’ll try not to shut-out my opponent. In the car racing games I’ll try not to finish more than a lap ahead. I think you get the idea….

You’re probably wondering what’s with the title? 

So the story goes something like this. Once upon a time in an arcade not so far from here (here being relative to everywhere, nowhere, and fairytale land) there where two people who were about to do battle on fields of air hockey. As we were putting down our drinks to play, as two sane people would do, something strange and unusual happened. It seems that my companion wanted to make matters more interesting. As a means of upping the ante, my opponent uttered a sentence to which there was no turning back. The expression in question was “Oh yeah? You think you’re so good? BRING IT ON!” Now as a pacifist, I would have ignored that remark and smirked to myself about false bravado and egotism, but the words “BRING IT ON” sealed the deal or possibly their fate. So I did what any honorable man would do…. I showed no compassion.  I mercilessly beat my foe game after game, one of which was a shut-out while in the others I gave my challenger a single mercy point, merely out of the kindness of my heart, or maybe it was sympathy. b-)

Due to the aforementioned incident, an apology would probably be in order. If you are the person in question, and you happen to be reading this, please accept these words as a consolation and a solemn request for absolution.  So here it is, my apology in full: In retrospect I feel terribly sorry. Not necessarily for cruelly beating you, come on, you deserve that, but for the gloating and scorning that ensued thereafter as well as my instigating a few rounds of snickering and guffawing  from the crowd of onlookers, and for that I am deeply and regrettably sorry. It’s not totally my fault; regrettably, you did put on quite a show! :> Oh, and FYI the loser is not supposed to throw the paddles at the winner, :p that is not in the rule book! :)

Just a few points of clarification: The story in question actually was not a date, but a boy’s night out, so my opponent was male, hence, mercy and chivalry weren’t exactly necessary. The drinks in question where beers and that may have been the reason why we had a game of “catch” with the paddles, although “throw” and “dodge” might be a better description. ;) The reason for the “Miss” in the post title is because “he,” the loser, whined like a little girl. :D  Anyway, it should be noted that in real life (i.e. dating) girls have gotten away with saying phrases of the same nature yet as a gentleman, I nonetheless try to at least make the score plausibly close. But be forewarned, don’t temp me; next time I may not be so kind... ;)  


  1. I learned early on that it's generally not a good idea to play competitive games with dates. People don't like to lose.

    But I remember the date I played chess with: I made sure to end it in a draw ;=). But that's not possible with every kind of game.

  2. Lol, so you mean I didn't really beat or meet my date when we played air hockey and bowling and miniature golf? I never suspected otherwise. How naive of me.
    I think girls want a fair game. I'll make sure to warn the next guy not to be so nice. Fair is fair!

  3. Haha great story with a "twist" in the end. :P

    I'm a sore loser (and winner) when it comes to games (be it card/board, video, or arcade games).
    I went bowling with a guy and then entered the mini-arcade in the side room. I was SURE I could beat him at both air hockey and the car game (my two favorite games), but I severely lost at both. I think he noticed I was annoyed and started to go easy on me, but that annoyed me even more.
    If I'm playing someone, I want them to bring in on!! :P

    (Ugh. Now I want to go to an arcade!)

  4. ha well most girls despise (i know i do) arcade dates. First off they are too early on int he dating and the girl doesnt feel comfortable to just kick back and play games. Anyway wat games is she suppossed to play beside air hockey??? I am not ussually pick about where to go but if a guy mentions ESPN zone i give a flat out NO!!
    SOOOOO awkward and boring.

    - bowling and miniature golf are not that bad
    hey does that mean when i beat a guy at two games of bowling and mini golf he was pretending?? not possible i told him he better try :)

  5. Sounds like you made a good scene. How much did you have to drink?

  6. Dude - if by beer you actually mean one of those 5% drinks they serve, and that had you engage in conduct that you would otherwise would not have, then I suggest you check your man gene at door and stick to diet soda.
    Sheesh - beer = soda.

    Also, never beat a girl too badly or too many times. These crazy females analyze everything and may conclude that you have an overly competitive or aggressive personality.

    Halfshared, unless your date was simply unathletic or you are really good for a girl, you most certainly did not beat him for real. Guys let girls win all the time because they 1) don't want what I wrote above to happen; 2) are embarrassed that they really may lose and don't try; or 3) think it is courtesy to make their date feel good.

  7. @ischayill:
    So what do you do on dates? At some point you’re going to have to play some game? Of course there’s always Candy Land and Chutes and Ladders. :)

    I don’t know. There are a few girls out there who are really good at air hockey. Do you feel like he was really trying? Okay, but if you lose don’t say I didn’t warn you… ;)

    @Sefardi Gal:
    Thanks. Glad you enjoyed it. :)
    Hehe, it seems us guys can never really “win.” :p

    Most? I doubt that. More like some. What do you mean; there are so many other games to play! A lot of girls like the racing games. I think I might be because most people have licenses, so they have at least some driving experience. Also some ESPN zones and Dave and Busters have bowling. But seriously, how is an arcade more awkward and boring than bowling?

    I can’t answer that, my expertise with fake losing is mostly limited to arcade games. ;)

    Nah, it wasn’t that crazy. We’re talking half a beer at most! In the scheme of things, that’s really not much. I think it’s called being geshmake ;) or so they say. :)

    In the future, can you please use a name! Thanks.

    Nope, alcohol played a minor role in the course of events that transpired, trust me. ;) Besides, who gets drunk at an arcade? That’s just dumb! You need both fine and gross motor skills in order to win. Over indulging in alcohol would definitely not be conducive.

    Is the reason you chose to be Mr. “anonymous” because you don’t want the girls to over- analyze your screen name selection? :) (Just kidding)

    Anyway, if you lose by too much, they’ll think you’re wimpy, and now if they think you’re not trying hard enough they’ll think you’re not being fair! As I said above, us guys can never really “win.” :p

  8. So you're saying you're a lush?

    We will have to continue this conversation in private. I'll send you a Google Talk invite, k?

  9. Not at all! (and how dare you, lol :p ) I’m just saying, some of my friends like acting crazy even without large amounts of alcohol.


  10. Oh I have friends like that, too.

    You can just deprive yourself of enough sleep and then it's easy to act like that.

  11. Some people have a natural ability to act crazy, no external factors required!

  12. SiBW: I've never actually gotten past date #3, and I don't usually do activities in the beginning. From the activities that I have done the best were running and biking. Shooting pool is also okay; although it's competitive it's more chilled.

    Taking long walks is always nice on the first date or two (provided the fair maiden agrees to it). If it's cool we'll pick up hot drinks at Starbucks, then once in a while sit down on a park bench. It's a lot better than sitting still in a lounge, coffee shop, or restaurant.

  13. What makes you think the girl isn't letting you win? Whenever I play air hockey on dates, I go easy and try to let the guy win about half the time. I don't want to insult his manhood.

  14. I'm a fan of activity dates, but sometimes things don't work out or it's just more enjoyable to sit and talk. Besides, there are a lot of cool lounges in the city - you just have to know where to go.

  15. Well, I think that the truth is neither of us were very good at anything :-). I don't really do those activities besides for on dates, and these kinds of dates aren't that often. I'm decent but certainly not very competitive.
    Btw, it's quite boring playing with average players.

    And I don't consider myself warned because it seems like all guys give the girl an easy game! You might be the only exception :-).

  16. @ishchayill :
    Those sound like some very good ideas. Let me know if you ever go to an arcade on a date, I’m curious to hear what happens.

    @air hockey queen :
    It’s pretty obvious; you can tell when a girl is actually trying, or at least I can tell. I totally agree, though, there are some girls who really are good. There was even one who let me win, but when I called her on playing “nice,” she made a point of showing off her skills.

    @tnspr569 :
    I hear that, but most girls seem to hate lounges (as evident from the first date project). Care to share your lounge recommendations?

    @halfshared :
    I can’t be the only one! :p I’m the only one who is willing admit it. :)

  17. no i do think its least everyone i talk to ....
    bowling and mini golf are more chilled cuz you know the routine and can talk at the same time.....they are not aggressive or particularly competitive games ( yes the object is to win but they are so long that the focus is not as intense)
    ok so their is racing air hockey and????? shooting? fighting games? - guitar hero? basketball? all these are not going to interest most girls --
    my one arcade date the i was wearing heels :) - which further complicates the matter.

  18. I'll email or IM you about it. My recommendations would probably give me away - I'm still trying to maintain some semblance of anonymity.

  19. @schoolgirl:
    I’ve never done a bowling date, just because you can’t talk to each other easily. How do you have a conversation when you both have to take turns walking away? Okay, I should have said this before; a game is only as competitive as you make it. Arcade games don’t need to be competitive, but you can make them that if you’d like.

    Ha, there are so many more games… skee-ball, trivia, and whole bunch of coin games. Some places even have pool tables and shuffleboard if you’re into that.

    Heels might be a significant complication. So can I ask you a question, is that the real reason why he beat you in air hockey? :p

  20. I dunno I still thinks its a fruitless attempt at having a good time when its so awkward there is no time to enjoy !
    So I used to think that about bowling dates but then after trying its not so bad its actually the perfect mix of activity vs converstion becase you sit and between turns chat a bit. Its also ussually quiet which is another advantage over arcades.
    Anyway no I lost fair and square bec I stink at air hockey
    I think that's just about all we played :)

  21. Maybe I’m missing the point, but I though the purpose of a date was to spend time with the other person. Seriously, how many dating locations are really “fun?” Hehe, that’s funny because most people I know prefer not to go bowling on dates! Strange. I guess we must know different most people then. :)

    Sounds like you had one bad date arcade experience and now you’re refusing to give it a second chance. Is that really fair? :p Btw, I think that’s mean. If a girl is clearly not enjoying a specific game, then her date shouldn’t continue playing it for an extended period of time.


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